Showing posts with label Kristen Stewart. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Kristen Stewart. Show all posts

Sunday, November 27, 2011

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 *

Director: Bill Condon
Cast: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner
Nikki Reed, Peter Facinelli, Kellan Lutz, Elizabeth Reaser, Billy Burke
Maggie Grace, Mia Maestro, Michael Sheen

They say a good director can turn a mediocre story into something cinematically astonishing, Breaking Dawn Part 1 proves that sometimes there is material so, so poor that it becomes impossible to save, regardless of who commands the production. With its unintentional comedic moments, preposterous "acting" and its truly ludicrous use of dramatic tension, Breaking Dawn Part 1 is a new low in an already ridiculous saga.
This time around, emo vampire Edward (Pattinson) and his beloved Bella (Stewart) finally tie the knot in what would be the grand finale in similarly facile teen romances. However things go wrong when Bella becomes pregnant - apparently no one knew vampires could knock up a mortal, which makes one wonder exactly what comes out of a vampire's seminal canals.
As the fetus begins to eat Bella from inside, a war begins to rage between the vampires and werewolves, once again putting broken hearted Jacob (Lautner) into the equation. Just how many wars, tepid love triangles and ultra conservative messages can one saga fit?
Time and time again, the Twilight movies make one wonder, just what exactly are these people saying? How can so little be said in so much running time? This chapter in particular made a case for being one where nothing really happens. Edward and Bella look at each other, look towards the distance having flashbacks of them looking at each other and then exchange melodramatic readings delivered with absolutely no consideration for dramatic purpose.
Where it wants to be deeply romantic, the film results impossibly dull, where it wants to be mature, it comes out as inexperienced. But other than its silly plot twists and terrible acting, there is something much more disturbing at the bottom of these films.
Author Stephenie Meyer might just be the most reactionary working writer of the past decade. Her moralistic ideas about sex, birthing and relationships are so old fashioned that they almost seem prehistoric. While the first three movies were based around the idea that "if you have sex you will get chlamydia and die" (thank you Mean Girls), this one grabs that idea and takes it even further into ultra conservatism.
Apparently for Meyer, marriage isn't enough punishment for horny teenagers who crave sex, they also will get pregnant and have to give up their lives for their babies.
What in a 1940s movie would've been justified reason for a big tearjerker, is pure denigration in the twenty first century. The fact that abortion - even in the face of severe health issues - isn't even considered as an option, isn't romantic, it's scary! By removing women's power to choose and preserve their lives, Meyer and the movies she inspired are doing a great disservice to any feminist movement in history.
Apparently to them, all that women are worthy of are being objects of desire to both the living and the undead. The vampires in these films aren't after the blood, they want to suck your brains out.

Monday, August 2, 2010

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse *1/2


Director: David Slade
Cast: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner
Bryce Dallas Howard, Anna Kendrick, Michael Welch
Sarah Clarke, Peter Facinelli, Kellan Lutz, Billy Burke
Dakota Fanning, Daniel Cudmore, Cameron Bright

By this point it should be more than obvious that the Twilight movies are definitely not meant for everyone.
The minute you walk into this movie you should know what you're getting yourself into. For those obsessed with the celibate vampirism and nonsensical romance between Bella (Stewart) and emo vampire Edward (Pattinson), no force on Earth would be able to make them see that there is not a single artistic quality to be rescued in this movie.
Unless of course, you choose to think that Taylor Lautner's body has a classical Greek aestheticism to it...
Those on the other side who only see the lackluster filmmaking aspects of the saga will no doubt indulge themselves in a constant trashing of what makes this so inefficient and will indulge in quoting the terrible dialogue, bashing Ms. Stewart's utter lack of soul and laugh out loud at the way Pattinson delivers his lines like a parody of a Victorian hero.
This time around Bella is torn because she can't decide if she wants to marry Edward and be turned into a vampire, if she has sudden feelings for werewolf friend Jacob (Lautner), what to do with the band of rebel vampires coming all the way from Seattle to kill her and what to wear for the upcoming graduation.
Nothing of much importance seems to occur in this chapter and we don't really learn anything new about the characters to justify its existence. It feels too much like a transition especially for the casual viewers.
This feeling of inconsequence is best evoked by the film's initial and final sequences during which Bella and Edward sit in a sunny field while they mope about their love.
That the film begins and concludes in the same way, just reassures us of the fact that everything that occurred in between was merely an excuse for these tow to put some drama into their lives.
Hey, if they're not having sex, at least they can channel their hormones through murder huh?
What can be rescued about this movie is the fact that it buys its message in such an un-selfconscious way that to loathe and attack it would be to do so to a being so into itself that it would never open its eyes to anything else.
Of course this doesn't have any sort of Dostoievskian magnitude and the film is far from being a clever examination of anything other than old fashioned values and the need for abstinence in a world where sex is only bad if other people know you're doing it.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Style Sunday.


I can't stand Kristen Stewart but damn does she look great in this RM by Roland Mouret sequined minidress.
Stewart has remained as uncreative as ever and has hot every red carpet, TV show and premiere of the new Twilight in short dresses (in either black or white) with high heels.
Yet this is the one look that has transcended, given how she even looks *gasp* comfortable!

Sunday, February 21, 2010

We're BAFTA-ing! Part 2.


As BAFTA announced the winner of its Rising Star award I was overjoyed at the possibility of seeing Carey Mulligan win a big award but then I remembered this is voted by the audience so of course Kristen Stewart won.


I know, Tahar, I was baffled she won as well (especially over Carey and you...)


The wonderful Peter Capaldi presented Best Animated Feature Film which obviously went to "Up"
Isn't it strange that "The Secret of Kells" was snubbed in its own homeland? (I mean the UK not England obviously...)
Seeing Capaldi made me want to puke when I remembered he was snubbed for Best Supporting Actor when Alec Baldwin got in of all people...


Penélope Cruz wasn't nominated for anything, "Nine" got one nod and so did "Broken Embraces". Watching her light up the screen when Foreign Language Film was presented made me wonder why are the Brits so enamored with Audrey Tautou's one note performances?
If I'm not mistaken she was nominated for "Amélie" where she's not all that, the movie yes, her performance meh and now she got in Best Actress for the dull "Coco Before Chanel" when Cruz for example was soooo marvelous in "Broken Embraces".
Assuming of course that they just wanted the foreign language factor...if not they could've nominated Katie Jarvis, Charlotte Gainsbourg, Abbie Cornish etc.


"A Prophet" won Best Foreign Language Film and the brilliant Jacques Audiard brought his posse to receive the award, The woman translated his speech while the adorable Tahar Rahim smiled in the background.


It was no surprise to see Kathryn Bigelow win Best Director for "The Hurt Locker". She of course looked fantastic and in her great speech encouraged people never to abandon "the need to find a resolution for peace".


When Kate Winslet came out to present Best Actress I was taken aback by how magnificent she looked.
Remember last year when she looked so constipated at every awards show (with the straight gowns in dull colors and severe hairdos)? This time she seemed floaty as she handed out the award to Colin Firth.


The sadly underrated actor made a great speech and confessed he almost said no to the part but never emailed director Tom Ford that answer because a repairman came over just as he was about to hit send.


The incomparable Ford looked proud and a million kinds of handsome as Firth compared meeting him as being "resuscitated" and advised the audience "don't ever press send and have your fridges repaired".


The awesome Mickey Rourke messed up his teleprompter lines and got one of the funniest jokes from the host who said he was sure Mickey hadn't been back home since winning the BAFTA in 09.


The undervalued Carey Mulligan finally won an award and looking breathtaking she confessed she hadn't expected to win (who can blame her with the preposterous way she's been treated in all these awards?).
"I wish I could make this speech like Colin firth and talk about fridges" she said completely ignorant of the fact that she was making my heart melt.


When Best Film came it was a bit stunning to see "The Hurt Locker" win the big one (especially when BAFTA is so nationalist) but it was a choice you really can't argue with, the win made sense after the show ended though...(read below).


While most shows are done with once the big award is handed out, BAFTA made us wait while Prince William and Uma Thurman (gotta LOVE those presenting pairs they come up with!) presented the legendary Vanessa Redgrave with an Academy Fellowship.


Redgrave was visibly moved as she went on telling stories about her childhood and told things she learned about Maria Callas (without the opera legend's knowledge).
She also made a penis joke and wrapped the whole thing up with a beautiful ode to the constantly changing medium of film.

Watching Redgrave appear onstage was glorious (especially when paired with a roaring standing ovation) and made me want to strangulate the people who moved the Honorary Oscars to a private dinner!
Shouldn't movies also be about preserving the great ones? Do we have to enjoy having the "Twilight" kids imposed on us while people like Roger Corman and Lauren Bacall get little sideshows?
Tisk tisk tisk AMPAS, BAFTA kicked your ass on this one.

Now back to "The Hurt Locker", just when I was thinking no film had won big, the announcer showed us the awards that had been presented earlier (BBC tape delayed this) and I was astounded to realize that "The Hurt Locker"'s tally had come down to:
  • Best Film
  • Best Director
  • Best Original Screenplay
  • Best Cinematography
  • Best Editing
  • Best Sound
it only lost two awards! "Avatar" got exactly that number of trophies but so did "The Young Victoria"...

I'm hoping this bodes well for Bigelow's masterpiece in two weeks, if not I can always use the snob card and say I prefer the Brits.
Wouldn't you?
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...